Monday, February 13, 2006
I've thought about it and thought about it and thought about it
{disclaimer: I expect no one but myself to understand the following}
and I'm going to do what my grandmother would have wanted me to do. I'm going to work on letting it go. I can hear her voice in my head - "Let it go, baby." But it'll always be there in the back of my heart. Because I never 100% forgive, I never 100% forget. If I distance myself from the cause, over time it'll be easier to not think about. I know there will be in-my-face reminders periodically, but I won't let it run my life or change the way I feel about certain issues. It has changed the way I feel about certain people. But I can deal. Can they?
The majority of my day of has been spent in contemplation. It's amazing the amount of thinking you can do while scrubbing your tub and your toilet. Perhaps it was the scrubbing the toilet part that helped me reach the above decision. Or perhaps it was planning out the two quilt squares I'm going to be working on in the next few days. One is for a memorial quilt for a beautiful person who is no more. The other is for a beautiful person, who I won't mention, but she's very deserving of being wrapped in love...and that's all a quilt square really is. Just a bit of love that you can see.
and I'm going to do what my grandmother would have wanted me to do. I'm going to work on letting it go. I can hear her voice in my head - "Let it go, baby." But it'll always be there in the back of my heart. Because I never 100% forgive, I never 100% forget. If I distance myself from the cause, over time it'll be easier to not think about. I know there will be in-my-face reminders periodically, but I won't let it run my life or change the way I feel about certain issues. It has changed the way I feel about certain people. But I can deal. Can they?
The majority of my day of has been spent in contemplation. It's amazing the amount of thinking you can do while scrubbing your tub and your toilet. Perhaps it was the scrubbing the toilet part that helped me reach the above decision. Or perhaps it was planning out the two quilt squares I'm going to be working on in the next few days. One is for a memorial quilt for a beautiful person who is no more. The other is for a beautiful person, who I won't mention, but she's very deserving of being wrapped in love...and that's all a quilt square really is. Just a bit of love that you can see.